Generation… Lost

You know in Scriptures, it had said that it would get to a point where people could not even come outside anymore. It is funny, because it just seems to be becoming more and more true every day.

A month ago, my son and I were walking across the street to go to the local corner store. You have probably all seen it in some of my gang stalking pictures. Its directly behind my house and only about 50 feet away. As I was crossing my yard, I looked over and saw a gang of young adolescents, sitting on a car parked in the parking lot. I was on the phone at the time, and had mentioned to the person, that I could foresee an argument with the kids on coming. As soon as I had reached the parking lot, one of the boys had turned around and told me to “delete” something. I’m not sure what he was talking about, as I was on the phone, but he must’ve thought that I was trying to take a picture of him or something LOL.

Still nevertheless I turned and told him that I did not have anything to delete, and that I was talking to my relative. He still kept running off at his mouth and cursing at me viciously. So I told him that he had a lot of nerve picking on a pregnant lady who was minding her own business, just trying to go to the store. He started pulling up his pants aggressively, and then he charged at me, getting ready to assault me and my son, the good boy that he is, went to defend his mother. My son told him off, to protect me. But I did not want him to get into any trouble. These boys were much bigger than he was, and there were many of them, where as Noah was just there by himself with me. So I just grabbed Noah and went into the store to tell the owner about the trouble outside instead.

These boys, had been lingering around that parking lot for quite some time. Every day for about a month or two, they had been sitting in a very large group of 10 of them. I live right there across the street, so I can see everything that they do, as well as hear them too. I noticed that the same kids were often starting a lot of issues with any kind of customer that came on the property, including younger kids, and adults too. I told the owner, if he did not make them leave, he would end up having a lot of his customers chased away. But he did not seem to have the ability to tame the situation, because there were so many of them on his property, and he could not call the police.

After this horrible situation, I was a little worked up. To almost had been attacked by a kid that was only about 12 or 13 years old was horrifying. To see a young child aggressively run at a pregnant woman as if he were going to hit her, definitely brought the scripture back to my mind. The world is changing folks. We live in our houses in our own little bubbles every day, trying to stay safe, trying to make a peaceful sanctuary for ourselves and our families. But the truth of the matter is that, people just don’t care anymore. People hold grudges for the longest time, they attack innocent people, and teenagers have no sense of respect or morality anymore.

I’m sure there are some wonderful teenagers out there. But the majority of the ones that I have seen, don’t really care about their behavior. It seems that their parents are so busy, that the kids often don’t have any guidance or supervision. I’m glad that I was able to stay safe in the situation, but, when it makes you wonder, when that little boy grows up… how much worse will he be? All that I can see, is a generation for the future that will be very lost. If people don’t try to start making some positive changes to be better examples that they can give as adults, these younger kids don’t stand a chance. And it’s just getting worse every day, in all ages , the age going lower and lower every year.

You know, you cannot even be nice to people in this world anymore because, I noticed that not even children, but also adults are starting to change. The world torments them, as my friend Dylan says. So it makes them bitter, and it gets harder for them to want to open up their heart. It’s true, that you can help, give all that you have, and try to help them find insight to make life better, and they will still only look for the negative. Another example of this is a friend of mine, that I knew when I was younger.

He ended up getting addicted to heroin pretty badly. He would lose touch with me for quite a while, and then pop up again. Back in 2015, he and his girlfriend had gotten into a fight over drugs, and she had thrown him out on the street. Whereas, the first person that he called had been me, knowing that I am always giving, and kind… He needed help, as he did not want to end up homeless or in a shelter. But before I could help, he ended up getting picked up by the local police department. And his drug addiction he had abused all of his family members. He had stolen from them, and when they did not have the capability to gain what he needed from them… he gossiped about them negatively. He manipulated them, and got aggressive when they did not want to help, or provide. Therefore, he did not have any friends or family left at that point. While he was in jail he did not have any commissary or items to keep him going. My father says that a person makes their own choices, and that each person has to cope with the consequences of their own choices in order to learn. I totally agree, but sometimes my compassion goes out to people and I still want to help them, even regardless of what they have done wrong. So I began sending him funds to keep him going. When he had finally gotten out of jail, he ended up at my house knocking on the door, seeking for a place to temporarily stay. I could not really afford to bring someone in, and I was nervous that even though he had been clean because he had been in jail, that he might end up on drugs again, staying at the house with my children. So unfortunately, I had to tell him no, but gave him some money for a hotel room, as it was dead of winter and I could not let him sleep outside in the snow. He ended up disappearing for a few years.

2018 came around. He had proclaimed that he was clean and living at a halfway house, rehab combination center. He had said that he had a new job, and that he had been so proud of himself that he definitely wanted to call me first, to share with me his progress. He had said that I had been there for him so much, that he had felt that I had been the only person that really cared. I was very proud of him, but I could still foresee his future, that he was not done with that lifestyle yet. I tried to still counsel him over the phone, and help him steer clear of any negative influences that could pull him back in. He had said he wanted to reconnect with his family, and needed a cellular phone. Therefore, I had purchased one for him since he had just started the job. I did not mind helping him, if it had promised a new future. Even though I knew in my heart that he would fall, I still had faith and hope though. I know that anybody can alter their future by choice. With the right support, I had hoped that he would make the right choices to make his future better than the vision that I had seen.

A few months later, he had called and said he had lost the phone that I had bought him, and that he was calling from an office. He carried on about having lost the phone, and begged to get money to buy another. I definitely knew that he had sold the cell phone in the streets, for more money to go get high with. So I told him that I could not afford to buy him another phone, because, I did not want my hard earned money going towards drugs. He swore up-and-down that he was not using the money for such things. The manipulation was very deceiving because he had seems so sincere, even though I knew under the surface, that he was not. I told him that the only thing I could do, would be to ask my family if they could loan me the money, so that he could get the phone and have communications with his family and me, considering he had disappeared many times and his family would call me very upset, wondering if he had died out there because they had not heard from him. So I thought to bring them some ease and peace of mind, by making sure that he had the phone still. So I loaned him the money when my parents had given it to me. He started to spiral down word even more.

Finally he had lost everything. He kept saying that he needed advice as to what to do. Now he had been upstate, far from his family down here in southern New Jersey. So I kept recommending that he come back down here. I told him to get on a drug rehabilitation program here in South Jersey, closer to his family, so that he could find a new job and get back on his feet. Perhaps obtain some counseling from me here and there. So he had told me that he wanted to do that,. But I knew, that he wasn’t going to. He wasn’t going to leave his life up there in the northern parts of New Jersey, far away from the drug game and his new friends that he had met out there, to come out here and try to get better. I still wondered why he would not choose to get better. I have counseled many people in addictions, and it still baffles me, because I can not see why somebody would want to continuously live their life going through phases of homelessness and incarceration.

Still, he asked me for money to help him get down here by train, and I still kept my fingers crossed that he would make the better choice, even seeing that he wouldn’t. I always try to see the light before the dark. After sending the money he disappeared again for about a week. And then I received a phone call of him saying that he just couldn’t make it that day and that he used the money to eat, but still wanted to come and needed more funds. to get back down here again. He had promised that he would not use it for anything else, so I sent him yet another $20.

I knew that I was getting used. And I still allowed him to do it because of the pity that I felt in my heart. For somebody to be that desperate, that they would use a good person, lie and manipulate them and just for their own ends, I definitely knew it had to be someone who was deeply troubled. So again, he used the money for his habit, and never got down here. I didn’t hear from him for about three weeks. And then he called my phone, asking me for more money and I told him that I knew he was using me and that I just could not send him any more money at all. I mean, I am a single mother of two, soon to be three. And I have bills to pay. I struggle enough as it is, still trying to keep up with giving to charity on the side as well. I had explained that to him and I also told him that I was having some health issues. But in those moments, he told me that he didn’t care about my health or about my situation, that he felt nobody helped him including me.

That really hurt me, because I had gone out of my way, more so than people in his family… just to help him out. But he still was screaming and cussing at me on the other end of the phone that I had never done anything for him. He denied the fact that I had ever bought him a phone or given him any money, and he started calling me some very nasty names. I thought to myself, “what is this world coming to, when you have given all that you are to others… but they only look at the negative. Obviously, this individual was only looking at the fact that I would not give him the money presently at that time, and not looking back on all that I had done for him over the last couple years. People will always seek to point out the small negative things, instead of looking at the positive, when it comes to jealousy, ambition, spite, or trying to get what they want out of life.

I know that a lot of you have probably encountered people like this at some point or the other. Perhaps, maybe they are not on drugs, or struggling with substance issue. But the idea is that, everyone has encountered someone that they have gone out on a limb for, that has abused them, over small negative things that have happened in their eyes, rather than focusing on all of the good things that you have done for them.

So in light of all of these events, it’s not just one person that I have encountered who was like that. It’s not just one kid that has threatened to attack some adult for no reason.

The truth is… is that it is happening more and more every day. All around the world, people are losing their respect in others. They think only for themselves, and fail to think about how another person feels or their condition at the time. Others, only think about what they need or want, and they will do anything to get it. Then you have some, who just hang on to small things because something did not benefit them or suit them at the time, the way they had wanted it to. It is far better to be forgiving and to be merciful, and I do forgive the people I have encountered that acted in the same ways that I have spoken about here. But again it has been many. But the point is, is that if we continue to show love and understanding we can still set a better example, adult or child involved. We have to fight for them, since no one else will. Don’t allow yourself to be attacked, or used. But we can still show compassion. And if anyone still acts out or hurts you, you know that the world is changing as a result of the darkness out there and you can be aware, still help, but always protect yourself. Things will continue to get worse, but at least you can strive to get better, and by helping others in a safe way, avoiding violence as well, you can set a better example. We all know that this is needed today. We need more love!